Author Archives: Nikki Holland

Why do you care?

Sometimes people ask me why I care about other people’s marriages. Why do I make “such a big fuss” about complementarianism? Isn’t how we do marriages a personal decision? Aren’t there happy and healthy complementarian marriages? When people practice complementarian marriages “right” aren’t they good marriages? Well. Yes. To all of that. But. As IContinue reading “Why do you care?”

Safe Relationships and Expanding Hearts

Last week a friend posted a story about a girl who had been hurt by the book I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris. She believes that the IKDG mindset contributed to the rape she experienced. Another friend of mine, who is a man, commented that he disagreed with her conclusions. This was my responseContinue reading “Safe Relationships and Expanding Hearts”

Practically Parenting our Equals: Religious Observance

This is the last of a series on egalitarian parenting that started here. If you are just “tuning in” it might help you to read the introduction to this series and also the posts on discipline and self control. We parent based on the premise that our children are equal to us before God andContinue reading “Practically Parenting our Equals: Religious Observance”

It’s my orgasm, not his [part 2]

This post is a guest post written by Jean Kamps. It is the second part of its title. To catch up on the discussion, see part 1. I see four glaring red lights flashing in Jasmine’s story, three things that we, the Body of Christ Himself, need to take into consideration if we are toContinue reading “It’s my orgasm, not his [part 2]”

It’s my orgasm, not his [part 1]

This is a guest post written by Jean Kamps. My dear friend recently shared a story with me. It highlighted one of the issues she and I have talked about before in such a perfect way. She’s given me permission to share some things with you. Her name, for the purposes of anonymity here, willContinue reading “It’s my orgasm, not his [part 1]”

Practically Parenting our Equals: Self-control

This post is part of a parenting series that started with a reader question. Before reading this post, I recommend that you first read the introductory post and the post about discipline.  Something that Brian and I hear is that we have to get our kids under control. It usually happens when someone sees oneContinue reading “Practically Parenting our Equals: Self-control”

Love and Doctrine

Over the past several years, starting with examining my complementarian beliefs (and ultimately rejecting them), I have been reading a lot about Christian beliefs and doctrines.  I found an article today about how love is never a mistake (which you should definitely read). And I really like it. Of course it brings up the question “HowContinue reading “Love and Doctrine”

How Equality Changed my Religion

My family/clan came out last week with the news that we have left our conservative evangelical denominations and become convinced Quakers — and we are gathering together to be a new little church! And nothing could possibly have surprised us more. Since we moved to Mexico, we’ve been searching for a church home. We wentContinue reading “How Equality Changed my Religion”

5 things every married man should stop obsessing over around single women

  This is a guest post written by Jean Kamps. I recently read an article that really rose my hackles. It’s not that this article was in itself overtly offensive, but that it came as the final feather that woke the sleeping giant. I keep coming across these and very similar views regarding Christian purity,Continue reading “5 things every married man should stop obsessing over around single women”