Just Married


It was my husband’s birthday this week, so I got to spend some time thinking about what a huge blessing Brian is to me. And it reminds me of one of the most common remarks I hear about him from other women:

“You’re so lucky.”

Especially when our twins were babies and people saw him carrying them all around, women that I didn’t even know would tell me that I’m so lucky that my husband is an involved dad. I have been told that I’m lucky that he participates with house work and cooking. I am lucky that he shoulders extra care-taking responsibilities when I’m sick. I have even been told that I am lucky to have a husband who supports my dreams.

Am I? Is this luck that my husband is this sort of man?

Shouldn’t all (or at least most) husbands be this way? Active in the home. Engaged with his children. Supporting the dreams and callings of the woman that he chose as his life partner. Caring for her when she’s sick.

We expect that wives should do these things as a given. As we ought! Shouldn’t we be expecting the same from husbands?

I submit that I am not lucky. I am blessed — he is a constant blessing to me, and I am so, so grateful for him. But it’s not luck.

Through the redeeming grace of Jesus Christ, Brian is a loving man who fills our home with the sacrificial love and light of Jesus each day. He pours himself out each day for us, as Jesus did for the Church.

As Jesus spreads His freedom ever farther, may more and more women experience this kind of godly husband, until people no longer think of me as lucky. Just married.


Published by Nikki Holland

I am a Quaker wife, mother, pastor, and writer. I work as the country branch director of a fabulous NGO in Belize City and I recently graduated with an MDiv from Earlham School of Religion. I love my family, and I love my community.

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